I remember when I was little and times were simple. When the years rolled by like days and the hours felt like seconds. My early childhood wasn’t scarring or horrifying for the most part, but there is always a thing we can all recall that still makes us quite unsettled and that was daycare for me. The location was my aunt’s house right around the corner from my house and I can still remember those feelings of annoyance I caught when the car wrapped around the corner where certain landmarks gave me the conclusion of exactly where I was going; daycare. My aunt who is my father’s brother’s wife was always called “Auntie”. I love my auntie and I still do, but I can’t deny the experiences I had in her house. On this specific day I had hotcakes from Mcdonald’s so I was quite satisfied with my pancakes and sausage that I shared with my sister who is my senior of 22 months. I ate my pancakes and sat there optimistically hoping that today would defy all the days of unhappiness, but my optimism would soon be knocked off the table and shattered onto the floor when my aunt came over with a red cup. She sat it on the table and told me to drink it. My eyes hovered over the cup and I saw the white puddle of nasty. I shrieked in horror, “I don’t drink milk,” I said in utter confusion as she kept insisting on poisoning me. Was I lactose intolerant? No. Was my mother? Yes. At my house we ate dry cereal and didn’t drink milk. If I had too much dairy I would get nauseous and regurgitate. She poured out some of the milk and kept going back in forth in pouring out more and more that there was barely any milk in it. All that was left was a little ring of milk at the bottom that barely covered the red color of the bottom of the cup. It seemed quite petty that she’d even want me to try that milk, that much milk can’t even make your bones strong. I won the battle, but not for long.
Apparently my mother wanted my hair washed and if you aren’t aware I am very tender headed, which basically means it is more painful to me then most to get my hair combed. I cried and cried while I laid on the counter and she scrubbed my hair in the kitchen sink. “Auntie you’re pulling my brains out,” I shrieked. The horror continued and didn’t end until my hairstyle consisted of several very quickly made plats.
I held my doll close to me as I walked down into the room where all the other kids were. My doll was a plastic, white, and a bald baby named Baby Boom Box. She was new, I’d gotten her for christmas from my step- great- grandma. I saw two boys that were older than me. One’s name was Joseph and the other was Caleb they both were brothers and were the last thing I wanted to see at this time. They were hitting each other with the pillows from the couch and asked if I wanted to join but seeing there were no more pillows I was struck with confusion. Before I could answer, I’d been stuck several times and was screaming for mercy on the couch clenching my doll. Then my doll fell out my hands onto the floor and Joseph grabbed it. Both of them took quite an interest in it and asked me questions about her. I politely answered and gave her name and they laughed and made fun of me. They threw off all her clothes and I reached for her but they were too tall or just held me back. Joseph had one of his hands wrapped around her head and kept threatening to take her head off and I fought as hard as I could to save her but I couldn’t and he beheaded her. I cried as I held her in my hands, I ran to my auntie as they laughed. Auntie simply pressed the head back on, but she was still dead and I was extremely upset. Then it was nap time.
Auntie has three children who are my first cousins. They are all boys. The oldest had a separate room, but the two younger ones shared a room and had bunk beds. It was always fun in their room because they had a TV and I could sit on the top bunk and we’d always watch Roll Bounce me, my sister, and our two cousins. Auntie was laying out the cots and making sure everyone got in one. I got in my bed and then she turned off the light and everyone laid on their cots and listened to the lullaby music. I looked around for my sister but she wasn’t there and I soon realized that she was in the boys room without me. I hopped off my cot and started to walk down the long hallway to the room, but I was caught and Auntie made me sit in time out. The little yellow chair sat on the wall of the hallway and I looked down it and saw the light coming out their room and heard Roll Bounce playing. I looked down at the floor and wept.